Friday, March 23, 2012

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain

Excellent! This book is so full of research and statistics it's hard to deny what I've known all along. There's just as much worth in an innately quiet personality than there is in an outgoing and gregarious one. Here, finally, is some vindication for us introverts who have felt flawed and sidelined by society because of our desire for a quiet and thoughtful environment. I listened to this as an audiobook during my early morning walks, a time I cherish for the very solitude of it, and found myself nodding and smiling in recognition at Cain's words. There is too much emphasis in today's society - North American and European in particular - on outward shows of charisma when there is actually zero correlation between an outgoing personality and intelligence or ability. People who are loud-talking life-of-the-party types are not necessarily smarter or more cultivated than the person who prefers to keep to themselves. It's horrifying for me to see how extroversion is considered the norm. Everywhere you go there's loud  music and TV screens and pressure to be in groups and be sociable and chatty and to 'come out of your shell'. Thanks very much, but I am perfectly contented and engaged right here in my solitude with my books, or with my family, or with one or two friends. It's a perfectly normal and enriching way to live. Cain makes sure not to dismiss extroversion; there is an undoubted value in assertive and dynamic people. It's just that they would do well to also respect and value the contributions that introverts bring to life as well.

If you can spare twenty minutes, watch the author explain her research and findings in this TED Talk...

7 comments:

Beth said...

I’ve always resented the pressure to be more social – why would I make such an effort to be someone I’m not?

Sam (Tiny Library) said...

This sounds amazing. I am a fellow introvert, comfortable with myself but sick of explaining why I don't always want to be social/go to clubs etc. Society definitely favours the extroverts.

Trish said...

Beth - I know! And then to be looked upon with pity like there's something wrong with being this way.

Sam - Yes, it's somehow considered rude to opt out of social activities, isn't it?

Shrink to Fit said...

I'm with you all on this! I wish this information had been around 50 years ago.

Trish said...

It's funny how slowly things like this take to become accepted and recognized parts of the human makeup.

Melwyk said...

I loved this book! I am really enjoying all the discussion she has sparked, and yet it still amazes me that there are people who think that being introverted is a pathology and a disadvantage, and try to train you out of your personality!

Preferring small groups and limited socializing is my way of interacting as well, and I've had many of the experiences that Cain talks about in this book, as I'm sure you have as well. I liked her evenhanded approach -- as you say, she makes it clear that there is nothing right or wrong about being introverted or extroverted, it's just the way someone is. I'm recommending this one to everyone I know.

Trish said...

I so appreciate the work she did with this book. She left no stone unturned.