Top Ten Tuesday meme hosted by Broke and Bookish
Bookish pet peeves? Yeah, I have a few.
1. An Endless Array of New and Diverse Characters: Please, authors, introduce your characters towards the beginning of the story and then leave it at that. Too many new introductions throughout the book from start to finish is overwhelming. Justin Cronin, I'm looking at you.
2. Dithering Spineless Characters: Okay, so I have a specific one in mind here just because I'd never come across one quite so irritating in an otherwise fabulous story. W. Somerset Maugham's Of Human Bondage took almost the entire book for the main character, Philip, to grow a pair and get on with his life. The same goes for Raskolnikov in Crime and Punishment.
3. Thick Books: I like a big beefy book, but anything more than, say, 700 pages gives me heartburn. If it takes an author that long to tell a story, then please just divide it up into two smaller books.
4. Thin Books: If it's less than 100 pages, then just go ahead and publish it in a collection of short stories. Otherwise I feel like I'm reading a pamphlet.
5. Sad Endings: I'm just going to come right out and say this: I like happy, hopeful, endings. And it doesn't even have to be *happy*, just, at least, hopeful. Cold Mountain comes to mind. After all he went through, he *spoiler* dies? Wait, what? So he leaves behind a pregnant wife, big deal. I want them all to live happily ever after on the mountain with a thriving farm and lots of children! Ugh, I think I may have even thrown the book across the room when I came to the end.
6. Bow-Tie Endings: Okay, so on the flip side of #5 is the ending that is so tidy I feel like tying a ribbon around the book and adding a cherry on top. The Thirteenth Tale, I'm looking at you. I loved the book, but the ending was just a little too perfect.
7. Silly Titles: The Something Something Something and Potato Peel Pie Society? I don't know, it might be a good book, but the title is just plain goofy. Kiss The Sunset Pig is another one.
8. Hip Character Names/ Silly Character Names: Some of the current fiction that's out there is so intent on being edgy and hip -Jodie Picoult, I'm looking at you- that if I see one more 'Theo' or 'Zoe' I'm going to scream. And the silly character name award goes to Charles Dickens. That's half the reason I have not read any Dickens to completion. That, and #3.
9. Endless Descriptions: This could apply to characters or history or scenery or whatever. Just give us the need-to-know information and then get on with the story.
10. Dream Sequences: I don't read dream sequences, period. Authors, please leave them out of your books completely.
Phew. Well that rant felt good. Thanks Broke and the Bookish for providing such a therapeutic theme to your Top Ten Tuesday.